I shopped at Home Goods today and saw mushrooms are apparently now all the rage. I laughed, they were all the rage when I was a kid in the 70’s. I have been feeling a bit time warpy today. A bit sucked into the vortex of the past. I scoffed at those mushrooms and went along my fruitless journey to locate more turtle garden art. I also declined a bunny that was lying down. Miracle, I know. I’m still thinking about it and right now some bitch is at Home Goods with it in her cart squashing all my bunny dreams.
Anyway, MiniBoobs and I spent this week bantering back and forth on how to repurpose the firepit frame and tiles into the garden. I got the idea for a bird bath under my willows. Then set about how to make my vision come true for as little money, time and effort as possible. But it still has to look amazing to my standards and it has to also feel right.
Yes, this logic is exactly why I spend so much time decorating and blogging about it. I set impossible expectations on not only myself , but also the universe around me and those within my circle inside it. Why I do this is pretty clear to me but it’s still a pattern I find myself repeating. Pushing myself and others to be better. Beyond good enough.
So I start the hunt for parts to make my creation. I look in my garage and house first. Thanks Dad for installing a little bit of the hold on to useful shit gene to go with the heavy in the gut and thighs body you also passed along.
In this case I knew I needed a bird bath topper part. I was thinking big saucer at Lowe’s but I happened upon this big shallow white glass bowl at goodwill for $6.
When I got it home I started playing around with stuff and evaluating it.
I do this with everything decor wise. It may be my “process”. When I land on the first option that feels right and looks right I get a little giddy rush. I relish in the joy of it until my mind starts the reevaluation process. Yes, but, what if we try flipping it? Might look or feel better or both?
So I make a tweak, or two,
or ten, or twenty, or… Which is why when you shop with me I have to think. I have a rule when I buy something new I have to love it and know exactly where it’s going. I’m going through this process in my head. Imagining the item in various places or setting in my house or garden. But all bets are off in a refresh. My little rules I set for myself are lifted in the name of exploring my way to the newly expanded Lola style. I never quite leave anything completely behind.
I putter around letting my ADD mind wander as it pleases. Waiting for the moment when perfect vision meets perfect peace of emotion. Sometimes it happens and I tell myself I’m a mother fucking genius, other times I’m happy but not delighted with myself. Sometimes I’m happy and three days or hours or minutes later realize I’m way off the mark and something drives me to getting closer to the best I can do.
Occasionally it’s fail after fail until I have to set it aside and live with the chaos it causes in me until I make peace or become newly inspired. I decorate like I garden like I cook, like I think and to some degree the way I love and expect to be loved.
Here is the journey of how the re-purposed fire pit went from vision to oh wow that looks like the perfecto title mushroom and it’s also retro blue and white. A nod to another layer of my style. My wedding China is a vintage blue and white. These are the bones. I’m still deciding what to do with the moss vs. cocoliner vs paint to tie it all together. Babu is epoxing the mushroom together right now.